Thursday, October 29, 2009

Praise and Prayer

I want to start my prayer page by praising God. October 30th marks my 5th Christian birthday. I have the memory of that dreary autumn day firmly lodged in my head, and I also have a journal entry to mark that day forever as the day I found Life. I had been struggling with depression for many months and had finally reached the end of my rope. Just a few weeks previously I had told a friend that I didn’t know how much longer I could take it. She had replied, “Jesus can help you with that.”

I had grown up in a Christian family but had never really taken God seriously. Being a Christian was just the cool thing to do until I grew up and realized how much it restricted me (or at least that’s how I saw it then). I told God that if He wanted me, He’d have to come down and speak right to my face. God didn’t answer my request the way I demanded Him to and so I rebelled, turned my back on Him, and, in time, came to mock Christians and even the idea of there being a God.

I hadn’t liked my friend’s answer but it took root and grew until this day a few weeks later, when I sat on my bed and recorded my first prayer: “God, I don’t want to fake it this time. If I’m going to do this, I really want to know You. Let’s do this for real this time.”

God wouldn’t answer the prayer of my youth because it was made in pride and arrogance. I know now that He had to wait for me to be completely broken so I could understand how much I need Him. When I finally prayed out of this understanding, God showed up and changed my life. The tears of despair became tears of joy. I could smile again and my laughter lost its malicious edge. I began to hope and look forward to the days ahead. I saw His fingerprints everywhere I looked and began to experience the God I had put my faith in, leading me to deeper and deeper faith.

There’s a new (as of this summer) song playing on Christian radio that reminds me of that first year after I came to know the Lord. When I hear it, the memories flood my mind and I feel joy fit to burst and sometimes find myself crying. I want to share that song with you. Here’s a link to a slideshow on you tube: Born Again by Third Day

I ask that you praise the Lord with me as I celebrate 5 years as His child. Also, please pray that I continue to learn what it means to be His child, the love lavished on me, the faithful promises He has made. I hope someday to have so much confidence in who He says I am that I can finally throw all fears to the wind and simply serve Him.

Please pray also for my financial support; I need to raise about $300 in monthly commitments to be at full support. If you feel led to join my financial team or to increase the amount you are already giving, you can click on this link: support page

Finally, praise God that I am on staff with YD Adventures year-round now and pray that I learn how to do my job well and that I have wisdom in what responsibilities to take on here in the office.

Thank you for your prayers and your support! I appreciate that God has placed each of you in my life. It’s an incredible journey and I’m glad the Lord has not asked me to walk it alone.